Advice from a Marriage Vetran ...

I have to say that one of the things that saddens me most is when couples decide to throw in the towel. There are many reasons .... and I don't want to place judgment on anyone ... yet the fact that two people who promised to love and cherish each other are going their separate ways hurts my heart.

I have many WWII veteran friends; my friend Marion and his wife Bernita have been married 64 years. Knowing this, I thought he could be someone who could give my blog readers marriage insight. Here is what Marion said:


My Bernita, at twelve years of age, saw her parents divorced in 1937. Her mother struggled to support her and her younger sister.

In April of 1943, Bernita graduated from high school and she could not seek a vocation of her liking because there was a war going on, World War II. Bernita had to go 60 miles to Evansville. At that time girls had to go into the War Production Industry. With fifty other girls, she made 50 caliber machine gun bullets. She learned at a young age how to support herself.

I faced combat in war. I was shot down and became a Prisoner of War in Germany. There was hunger, no shelter, sleeping in fence rows and forests. Each of us survived our situation. We met in August 1942, then after two years absent from one another we came back together on June 14, 1945. Our love was so deeply embedded nothing could put us apart.

With what we went through in the young years of our lives. We stood before our church alter July 6, 1945, swearing by a covenant before God, till death do us part, that we could endure, that our marriage would endure.

We started out in a three room apartment. All we had was a bedroom suite, living room furnishings and kitchen dining table, and a kerosene cook stove. Kitchen shelves were made by orange crates. Toilet facilities were at the end of a 100 foot path out the back kitchen door. There was running water, but 12 feet outside the kitchen door was our pump with water from a cistern brought into house with three gallon bucket.

With all this, brings us here 64 years of marriage ... our journey in life brought us to where we are today.

Maybe it was the era of time and hardship we lived that made us willing to tough things out. It gave us determination to want to survive, want to live, want to be together in our journey in life.

By hard work and determination, we worked together to change the lifestyle we came through our developing years. We wanted to make a new cultured life, yet we also merged and molded some of the old conservative traditions into a present day lifestyle.

My best advice is to pray, live the good life, be happy, and laugh a lot.

Marion.

Guest Blogger ... Ben Whiting!

The Waltz of Writing

The more I write these blog posts, the more I find myself becoming a blogger. That is to say, I am seeing blog posts everywhere I look it seems, and with all of the English classes I take at college, there is plenty of commentary on writing to twist into posts like these.

With an opening like that, you shouldn’t be surprised that I’ll be expounding on a quote I read at school. If you are, don’t worry about it--I’m not awarding points this week anyway.

Writing with Practiced Ease

In An Essay on Criticism, Alexander Pope said that “True ease in writing comes from art, not chance, // As those move easiest who have learned to dance.”

This is definitely not an argument for the idea that great writers are born, not made. Masterpieces don’t happen by accident. Luck or providence, as you will, may play a role in catching an editor’s eye, getting that glowing review from a crucial critic, or something similar, but the production of brilliant prose is anything but the result of coincidence.

Hard work is necessary to become a great writer. You have to practice for hours on end, when you feel like it and when you don’t.

Learning Like Pro

You have to be willing to learn from anyone. Think about it for a second: if you can always get better at writing, how can the best writer in the world get better unless he or she learns from someone who isn’t as skilled?

A twelve year-old recently out-drove Tiger Woods on a golf course. Tiger Woods is indisputably the best golfer currently playing the game, but don’t you think he probably took away a lesson from this? I can’t claim to know what Tiger is thinking, but I imagine he might have reminded himself to relax a little more, or to be smoother in his backswing.

In writing, be open to learning, even from writers who might not know as much as you do. Even the best have blind spots and weaknesses, and sometimes a simple comment from outside can help us see.

Think. See. Do.

You don’t just learn in one way. A dance instructor is going to tell you what to do, where to put your foot, how to remain balanced as you spin. This corresponds to the books, articles, and classes out there that teach the art of writing.

But the instructor will also demonstrate these moves for you. You have to observe as the master shows the student how excellence is achieved. This is the part where you read the writing of others. Focus on writers in your genre or field, but do some sampling as well. Read something very different from what you typically do. You might find that watching a Tango can help you with your Samba.

Finally, you have to get out on the floor and go for it yourself. You have to feel the floor under your feet, the weight of your body as you move. Sure, you’ll make mistakes, but actually feeling those mistakes will give you a more intimate understanding of them and help you to avoid them in the future.

The fabled muse is supposed to make writing easy. When the muse is hanging around, that works great. If you find, as I do, that your muse is a little fickle and prone to hide when most needed, you may want to try the ease that Pope writes about by learning to dance.

~o~

Ben Whiting is a full-time English student at the University of Texas at Arlington and co-general editor of the award-winning collegiate publication Marine Creek Reflections. He recently completed the rough draft of his suspense novel, Penumbra.

13 Tips for the Overcommitted, Overloaded, and Overwhelmed part 5

Read part 4 here.

“Better one handful with tranquillity than two handfuls with toil and chasing after the wind.” Ecclesiastes 4:6

And now for the tips!

“We spend ten percent more than we have—and it no longer matters if one is talking about time, energy, or money. We work hard, play hard, and crash hard.”
–Richard A. Swenson, M.D.

Just Do It
Change can happen. Especially when we realize getting our priorities in order makes us available to God and to those most important in our lives. To summarize, we can stop the insanity by 1) focusing on what’s most important, 2) concentrating on key people, and 3) using ministry as family bonding time. Only then will we be truly available to the work of God in our lives, in our families, and our service.

Major on the Majors
Want to focus on the most important? Try this:
1. List everything you do in your day, your week, your month.

2. Rate these items on a scale from 1 – 4. “1” being most important, with “3-4” things that are nice but you can live with out. (For example, cooking dinner, giving kids baths, reading your Bible, spending time with your spouse would all be “1s.”)

3. Ask yourself: “Will this really matter five years from now? Ten? Is God at work here, or is it my own ambition?” Also, “How does this task rank in light of eternity?”

4. Eliminate out all the “4s.” Consider which “3s” you could put off for now. This may mean taking your toddler out of dance class. (Will she even remember it a few years from now?) Or cutting down on your television usage.

5. Revise this list over the coming weeks. Ask God to show you what tasks to focus on.

Top Tips
1. Get a good night’s sleep.
2. Take control. Don’t blame others for your overload.
3. Say “no.” Prayerfully consider every request.
4. Set boundaries to protect your family time.
5. Seek solitude in order to sift through your daily problems and brainstorm solutions.
6. Ax the guilt. No one can do it all.
7. Refuse to compare your weaknesses with someone else’s strengths.
8. Decide what things matter most in light of eternity.
9. Realize that kids will someday be grown up. Enjoy them now.
10. Spend quality time with your spouse. Encourage each other.
11. Don’t get caught up in the “extracurricular activities” trap. There are many successful adults who never played t-ball or took piano lessons.
12. Realize the values children learn from down time and home life will set a foundation for their future households.
13. Seek God. Our limitations remind us how much we need Him.

“Change can happen. Especially when we realize getting our priorities in order makes us available to God and to those most important in our lives.”
–Richard A. Swenson, M.D.

12 Pearls of Christmas: Celebrate

What Really Matters
by Dawn Meehan

In the hustle and bustle and commercialism of Christmas, take time to remember the real reason why we celebrate - the birth of Christ, our Lord and Saviour. May you all have a blessed Christmas!

I had a VERY long day with the kids doing little but fighting. By the time we left for church, we were all short tempered, snapping at each other, and not at all in the Christmas spirit. Thankfully, once at church, we calmed down. Things were put in perspective for us. We sang Christmas songs and began to smile at one another again. The kids didn't fight once while we were there. Well, they did use their battery operated candles as light sabers for a minute, but we'll forget about that part.

I never sent out cards (sorry to all my family and friends). It just didn't happen this year. I don't think I ever completely finished my shopping, but it's a little late now. Several items I ordered online have been back ordered. I just realized that the kids have eaten all the cookies I've made and there are none to put out for Santa now. I encouraged them to leave him a glass of wine instead. And I failed to read the Christmas story to the kids before they went to bed.

But you know what? None of that matters. It really doesn't. Christmas is here! Christ is born! And He doesn't care if we sent out Christmas cards. He doesn't care if we ate all the cookies we baked. He doesn't even care if we never got around to baking a single cookie at all! He loves us no matter how much we screw up.

Now that's worth celebrating!

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Dawn Meehan (aka mom2my6pack) grew up in Chicagoland where she began her writing career at the age of 5 with her widely praised, The Lucky Leprechaun, an epic tale of a leprechaun who is- yes, you guessed it, lucky.

Dawn has six children, basically because she didn't want seven. She is the author of Because I Said So and spends her days blogging at BecauseISaidSo.com, changing diapers, cleaning pudding off her ceiling, tackling insurmountable piles of laundry, and explaining to her kids why they can't have a pet squirrel or an indoor slip-n-slide.

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A three strand pearl necklace will be given away on New Year's Day. All you need to do to have a chance of winning is leave a comment here. Come back on New Year's Day to see if you won!

12 Pearls of Christmas Series and contest sponsored by Pearl Girls®. For more information, please visit www.pearlgirls.info

12 Pearls of Christmas: Slow Down, Pray & Give Thanks

All Decked Out For Christmas
by Maureen Lang

One of the reasons so many of us love the holiday season is that it's just so...pretty! Twinkling lights, shiny ornaments, packages that glisten with bows and fancy wrapping. Our houses are trimmed with wreaths and glowing trees, and the neighborhood lights up the night with strands of icicles and glimmering reindeer.

Even we get decked out for the holidays! Chances are most of us will attend at least one party this season, and if we don't usually don clothing or jewelry with a bit of sparkle, now's the time to take a chance with something that reflects the holiday.

Smiles are another reason this season is such a popular one. They accompany that familiar greeting-Merry Christmas! Smiles go with the gifts we give and with the gifts we receive. Smiles go with the old Christmas carols and classic movies we watch every year.

The holiday season is a time when everything can seem amplified. But what if we're all decked out on the outside, from the sparkling clothing to our best effort at a smile, and on the inside we're anything but happy? If life isn't what we expected it to be, the gap between reality and our happy, hopeful expectations seem wider when everyone around us is laughing through the season.

I know there are as many reasons to be unhappy as there are to be happy, and I wouldn't begin to have the answer to make this season bearable for everyone. But I do know a few things that have worked for me:

Slow down. What? During the busiest time of the year? Yep. I know when I feel completely overwhelmed it's because I'm pressuring myself to do too much. So I try to plan ahead, settle for less than perfection, do my best without driving myself and everyone around me crazy. Choose what's really important and let go of the other things. And I've adopted my aunt's favorite saying: "However it turns out, that's how we like it." Works wonders on attitude!

Pray. As my pastor reminded me this weekend from Psalm 34:18: the Lord is close to the brokenhearted and saves those who are crushed in spirit. God may not deliver us from our troubles, but He promises to stay beside us-in fact, closer than when everything seems hunky-dory.

Find a moment to give thanks for what you do have (without looking around at those who have more).

This last point deserves a moment of reflection, and is something I'm still learning to do. I have a child severely handicapped by Fragile X Syndrome, a genetic form of mental retardation. For years I thought I'd accepted his condition. I obediently said to God, "thank you even for this," since it taught me many things about adjusting to the life I've been given rather than the one I might have chosen.

But as my son gets older, I see new forms of acceptance making that feeling of gratitude more genuine. I think I'm finally letting go of some of the hopes and dreams I had for him, my oldest son. I can no longer imagine him any other way than the way he is, even though I'd be first in line if a cure is ever found.

I still think it's a good thing to give thanks in all things, even if it begins out of obedience rather than tender gratitude for whatever thorn we live with. But realizing it's okay to grow into that gratitude was a blessing to me.

Maybe some of the bruises on our spirit seem tender during the holiday season, a reminder that all the glitter on the outside might not light us up on the inside. My prayer is trust Psalm 34:18. Let's lean on Him this season-He's right here beside us!

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Maureen Lang grew up loving to tell stories, and God has blessed her immeasurably to be able to tell them to a wider audience these days. For the latest goings-on, please check her blog!

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A three strand pearl necklace will be given away on New Year's Day. All you need to do to have a chance of winning is leave a comment here. Come back on New Year's Day to see if you won!

12 Pearls of Christmas Series and contest sponsored by Pearl Girls®. For more information, please visit www.pearlgirls.info

12 Pearls of Christmas: Wondrous Mystery

Magnificat
by Anna Joujan

Holy. Holy. Holy is the Lord. The familiar catch of breath. The sting in the eyes. And the tears begin to flow with the falling rain. Or do the tears fall with the flowing rain. What is it in these words that I whisper that wrenches at my heart so? Why does Mary's prayer touch the core of my being, so many centuries after it was spoken?

I think it must be because I know that she was just a girl, just a human being, with a woman's heart like my own. And so, when I hear her wondering words, I can feel with her the emotion she must have felt. To bear the son of God-what wondrous mystery, what glorious honour! And she was, like me, just a young woman-much younger, in fact, than I am now. And so, no matter how often I hear the story and read her words, it still has the power to bring abrupt and unsought tears.

What a gracious God, to work wonders with such frail and faulty creatures as us!

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Anna G. Joujan was born in South Dakota, as a Canadian citizen, and was raised in Zambia, the child of missionary teachers. Since her family's move to the U.S., Anna spent her childhood and early adulthood traveling throughout the world thanks to various educational and work opportunities . . . France, China, Peru, and Jamaica being some of the stops in her journeys. Her undergraduate degree in French Literature led to a Masters in Information Sciences, and to work as a college and high school librarian, and a cross country coach. She has also returned to Zambia multiple times to teach for individual families and for local schools. All the while continuing pursuing her passions of writing, artwork, photography . . . and running to a fault. She blogs at Full of Grace.

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A three strand pearl necklace will be given away on New Year's Day. All you need to do to have a chance of winning is leave a comment here. Come back on New Year's Day to see if you won!

12 Pearls of Christmas Series and contest sponsored by Pearl Girls®. For more information, please visit www.pearlgirls.info

12 Pearls of Christmas: Perspective

A Soggy, Jolly, Holly Christmas
by Melody Carlson

One of my most memorable Christmases started out as a natural disaster. But isn't that a bit how a pearl is formed? An oyster's soft easy life is disrupted by the invasion of sand, but something good comes out of it. When I was eight, we experienced the worst flood in recorded Oregon history. It was only a few days before Christmas when our streets became shallow rivers and the governor proclaimed a state of emergency. My sister and I assumed the flood was simply our new water-world playground and didn't understand the seriousness of washed out bridges and downed power lines and submerged homes. But when we realized this flood was about to nix our usual three-hour trek to our grandparents' home near the coast, we were not happy.

Naturally, our mom, a single parent, protested the sensibility of holiday travel (most of Oregon's rivers were involved in the flood). But Christmas at Grandma's house was our favorite event of the year. And thanks to our persistence, Mom finally gave in. We piled into the car and headed out. Flood waters climbed higher the closer we got to the coast. And at one point the road behind us was closed and the one ahead was flooded and about to be closed as well. The state policeman told us we could cross "at our own risk." We followed a Volkswagen Bug into the water-then we actually watched the bug floating away! Of course, there was nothing to do besides plow on through the water, which appeared to be nearly two feet deep! Fortunately we had an old heavy Chevy that did not float away, but the water seeped in and pooled on the floors.

Fortunately, we made it safely to the grandparents. But once we arrived, we learned there would be no Christmas tree because the road to the woods was closed. Then my grandpa picked up his ax and led us outside where he chopped down his prize holly tree planted in the parking strip. I stared in horror, thinking Grandma was going to have a fit. But then he explained the city had told him to remove the tree for traffic visibility. So we had a twelve foot holly tree for Christmas. It was a little prickly decorating it, but with its shiny green leaves and red berries, it was the most beautiful tree ever! So what started out as a disaster turned out to be a soggy, holly, jolly Christmas after all.

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Melody Carlson, author of Limelight, Love Finds You in Sisters, The Christmas Dog, 86 Bloomberg Place, Diary of a Teenage Girl, The Carter House Girls, and much more... http://www.melodycarlson.com

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A three strand pearl necklace will be given away on New Year's Day. All you need to do to have a chance of winning is leave a comment here. Come back on New Year's Day to see if you won!

12 Pearls of Christmas: Help & Support

Calling Elizabeth ... HELP!
by Tricia Goyer

Mary, the mother of Jesus is one of the most well-known women of all time. She was also a teen mom facing an unplanned pregnancy. This Christmas we will see evidence of Mary's story all around us. And as you hear it through Christmas songs and Christmas shows think of three things:

1. Mary was signed up for a big task she wasn't prepared for.
2. Mary no doubt faced criticism from people around her.
3. Mary found someone to turn to - a friend who could help Mary to succeed in her new role. It was Mary's older cousin Elizabeth.

Elizabeth played an important part in Mary's life. We know this because the book of Luke begins by telling us Elizabeth's story first. Elizabeth was the wife of a priest. She was very old and had no children, but God blessed her in her old age by allowing her to get pregnant. After Elizabeth's story comes Mary's story ... another surprise pregnancy. Can you imagine what a shock that was to everyone who knew both women? (Yes! I'm sure you can!)

The cool thing is that the angel Gabriel told Mary about Elizabeth's surprise pregnancy. It's as if he was saying, "Look, there's someone in your same situation. Turn to her. She can help you."

Mary did go to Elizabeth. In fact she lived with her older cousin for three months. Elizabeth was the first one who rejoiced over the child Mary held within her womb, and I imagine Elizabeth was there to encourage Mary as she coped with the idea of becoming a teen mom.

Like Mary, each of us should have people in our lives who we turn to for help, support and encouragement. Being a mom isn't an easy thing, and facing an unplanned pregnancy is even tougher.

When I had my son Cory I was 17-years-old, and there were a group of women from my grandma's church who supported me. They were the first ones who showed me that the child that was growing inside me was a gift. They gave me a baby shower, and they fought over holding my son after he was born.

As my son grew, there were other women I looked to ... and most of the time they didn't even know I was watching. One of them was Cheryl. Cheryl was patient with her children, she gave them big hugs, she laughed with them and played with them and I modeled myself after her. The thing about finding mentors is sometimes we can observe them without them even knowing. And if we're really lucky they enjoy their role of giving us advice.

Later, when I had two kids, I met a friend named Cindy. She and I were the same age and we became quick friends. Cindy was a support to me because we traded babysitting, talked about parenting problems, and we encouraged each other. She was someone who was walking the same road as me, and her advice helped more times than I can count.

No matter who we are, or where we live, each of us can look around and see the people we have in our lives. Some may cheer us on, some may guide our parenting, and others may just be there to walk along side us. If the mother of Jesus needed someone to look to for support ... shouldn't we? Everyone needs someone to provide a little help and support.

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Tricia Goyer is the author of twenty-one books including From Dust and Ashes, My Life UnScripted, and the children's book, 10 Minutes to Showtime. She won Historical Novel of the Year in 2005 and 2006 from ACFW, and was honored with the Writer of the Year award from Mt. Hermon Writer's Conference in 2003. Tricia's book Life Interrupted was a finalist for the Gold Medallion in 2005. In addition to her novels, Tricia writes non-fiction books and magazine articles for publications like Today's Christian Woman and Focus on the Family. Tricia is a regular speaker at conventions and conferences, and has been a workshop presenter at the MOPS (Mothers of Preschoolers) International Conventions. She and her family make their home in the mountains of Montana. Connect with Tricia at www.triciagoyer.com.

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A three strand pearl necklace will be given away on New Year's Day. All you need to do to have a chance of winning is leave a comment here. Come back on New Year's Day to see if you won!

12 Pearls of Christmas Series and contest sponsored by Pearl Girls®. For more information, please visit www.pearlgirls.info

12 Pearls of Christmas: God Intervenes

The Answer
by Susan May Warren

Whos, Here, we are Whos here, smaller than the eye can see. Whos here, we are Whos here, I'm a Who and so is she...

I've always wanted to live in a musical. When I was a kid, I loved Oklahoma, Sound of Music, West Side Story. I seriously thought that, if the moment was right, maybe the stars aligned, people would break out into song and dance.

I was sorta right. Because in my house, one needs to be able to talk in movie lines and song lyrics to effectively communicate. At any moment, someone might break out with a quip from the Princess Bride, or Finding Nemo. They might sing Tomorrow from Annie, or My Favorite Things like Julie Andrews.

But, most recently we've found ourselves speaking in "Suess"...

It's suppertime, son, and the time is near To call far and wide the sneetches who hear Just the sound of their bellies, the whir of their gear The Gurgles and Burbles that give them great fear Tell them all, tell them loud, tell them clear Their hands they should wash, check their face in the mirror Because the food is now ready and it's time to steer Close to the table, where they'll find hot gribbles here.

Why, you ask? Because David and Sarah are performing in the community theater's production of Suessical the Musical, a hilarious conglomeration of Dr. Suess' fun work, from Horton hears a Who to Horton Hatches an Egg.

As the Christmas season draws close (and the songs from the play linger in my head), one line has stood out to me... "We are here, we are here!" You know the story - that part where, after everyone has called Horton names and they're about ready to boil the speck that contains Who-ville, Horton calls out to the Whos to send up a cry to prove themselves as real. "We are here, we are here!"

It strikes me that sometimes we can feel like Whos...smaller than the eye can see. Tossed hither and yon by the wind, helpless and facing being boiled. Tired, perhaps, or alone. Wishing someone might find us and pay attention.

Someone has, and that's the good news about Christmas. Because we don't have to "make ourselves heard," like the Whos. In fact, even before we realized we were headed for the cauldron, God intervened. God demonstrated his own love for us in this - while we were yet sinners, Christ died for us. (Rom 5:8). That's what Jesus is all about - he's the answer to even the unspoken cry of our hearts, saying, "I am here, I am here." Lo, I am with you always, even to the end of the age.

So as this season approaches with its whistles and bells I hope you hear the voice where the Mighty One dwells -- down deep in your hearts, so nothing can shake the knowledge of his love, given all for your sake.

Merry Christmas from Susie May Warren

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Susan May Warren is the award-winning author of twenty-one novels and novellas with Tyndale, Steeple Hill and Barbour Publishing. Her first book, Happily Ever After won the American Fiction Christian Writers Book of the Year in 2003, and was a 2003 Christy Award finalist. In Sheep's Clothing, a thriller set in Russia, was a 2006 Christy Award finalist and won the 2006 Inspirational Reader's Choice award. A former missionary to Russia, Susan May Warren now writes Suspense/Romance and Chick Lit full time from her home in northern Minnesota. www.susanmaywarren.com Check out her Christmas Novella, The Great Christmas Bowl.

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A three strand pearl necklace will be given away on New Year's Day. All you need to do to have a chance of winning is leave a comment here. Come back on New Year's Day to see if you won!

12 Pearls of Christmas Series and contest sponsored by Pearl Girls®. For more information, please visit www.pearlgirls.info

12 Pearls of Christmas: He is Always Enough

Christmas in a Barn
by Mary DeMuth

The Christmas of 2006 we were homeless. We didn't have keys. Not to a car, not to a home. We'd flown halfway around the world, leaving behind a ministry we toiled over. Much, particularly in our hearts, lay in ruins.

Some friends had a camp, and on that camp stood a barn. In the corner of the barn was a tiny apartment, flanked by this caboose and hundreds of acres of Texas pasture. We'd never been there before, so we followed directions at night, making plenty of wrong turns.

When we found the place, we drove a borrowed car over the cattle guard toward what would be our home for a month. String lights illuminated a small porch, a window and a door in the corner of an aluminum-sided barn. We hefted large pieces of luggage to the apartment.

And when we opened the door, Love welcomed us.

The place, usually completely unfurnished in the winter, was decked out with just the right amount of beds, couches and tables. The pantry was full. We had dishes and garbage cans, and cups and forks and food. But even more, we had a Christmas tree. Friends had hijacked the place, decorating it for Christmas. Cookies preened on the table.

I will never, ever forget that Christmas. We had so little. We felt the painful burden of failure. But we were loved, so terribly and wonderfully loved.

Christmas felt right there, in a barn. We heard the nickering of horses, the meowing of kittens, the clop of hooves against the barn floor. Chickens and goats and cows served as a holy object lesson of the incarnation. Although we were warm and clothed, we understood more keenly the Savior's homelessness, how He left the splendor of heaven for the sodden earth. We experienced barnyard life alongside him, without much to call our own except our Heavenly Father and our sweet family.

He was enough, that Christmas. And He will always will be.

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Mary DeMuth writes fiction and nonfiction. Her latest book, A Slow Burn released in October and she has a memoir entitled Thin Places coming out in February of 2010. You can meet her: http://www.marydemuth.com, http://www.thewritingspa.com, on Facebook and Twitter!

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A three strand pearl necklace will be given away on New Year's Day. All you need to do to have a chance of winning is leave a comment here. Come back on New Year's Day to see if you won!

12 Pearls of Christmas Series and contest sponsored by Pearl Girls®. For more information, please visit www.pearlgirls.info

Christmas 2009 ~~ The Songs of Our Lives

(Songs each person chose to represent his/her year.)

John & Tricia

What a Wonderful World by Louis Armstrong

I see skies of blue and clouds of white

The bright blessed day, the dark sacred night

And I think to myself what a wonderful world...

This year John and Tricia saw a bit of the world. First, our family traveled to San Diego to see family for New Years, then John and Tricia traveled to the Canadian Rockies for a weekend getaway and to the Bahamas to celebrate their 19th wedding Anniversary. Also, the whole family traveled to the Czech Republic for our 2nd mission trip. Tricia's shorter jaunts included California (2 more times), Idaho, Washington and Colorado. More than that, Tricia's writing has taken her places too. She had five books release in 2010:

* Every Sunrise & Sunflower Serenade (Nebraska) ~ Guideposts
* Blue Like Play Dough (my life in California & Montana) ~ Multnomah
* Love Finds You in Lonesome Prairie, Montana (Montana 1889) ~ Summerside
* The Swiss Courier (Switzerland & Germany, 1944) ~ Revell/Baker

Yet it's not just our travels that has made our world wonderful. We are thankful for our OWN world—our home, our family, our church, our friends!

Nathan (15)

The Best Night of Our Lives by Every Day Sunday

Don't fall asleep

We don't want to miss a moment...

Nathan's Top Three favorite things this year: going to the Czech Republic, starting his novel, and playing/creating video games with his brother. He is a homeschooling Sophomore, volunteers a lot with Media at church, and is involved in his youth group's leadership team.

Leslie (17)

Superstar by Stephanie Smith

You may not make the walk of fame. A star may never wear your name. O-Oh O-Oh But you will always be the lead inside his dream. Way before you ever knew a bigger plan included you, not that hard if you just try cuz, you and I were made to shine.

Leslie is finishing up her third semester at Flathead Valley Community College and she'll graduate from college just in time to attend her high school graduation! She is still considering how/where to continue her education, but her focus will be on Biblical Studies and youth ministry. Leslie works part-time at Wendy's, loves hanging out with her friends and boyfriend, recently took part in a theater production at college, enjoyed traveling to the Czech Republic … and greatly misses her sister Andrea (our exchange student who returned home in June). In fact, all of our family greatly misses Andrea!

Cory (20)

Life Is Beautiful by Sixx AM

Just open your eyes

Just open your eyes

And see that life is beautiful.

Yeah! Cory finished his AA Degree at Flathead Community College. His plan is to stick around next year to get his AS Degree and to work toward his Bachelors before transferring to the University of Montana where he will be a pre-med student. His goal is to be a physical therapist. He loves God, the Czech Republic, playing sports, and hanging out with his siblings, friends, and girlfriend. He's also looking forward to returning to the Czech Republic Summer 2010. We all are!

Grandma Dolores (80!)

This is the Day that the Lord Has Made

This is the day that the Lord has made

I will rejoice and be glad in it!

Grandma turned 80 this year and we had a fun surprise birthday party for her. Grandma's favorite things are spending time with God, watching old movies, going out to lunch and shopping. She enjoyed having her daughter Linda stay with her while the rest of the family was in the Czech Republic. She wants to go to Hawaii before she gets too old … so we'll have to plan for that!

We hope this letter finds you well. We are thankful for your friendship and your prayers!

Love,

John, Tricia, Cory, Leslie, Nathan, and Grandma

12 Pearls of Christmas: Faith, Hope & Love

The Pearls We Pass Down
by Holley Gerth

Ten years ago my Grandma Frances went home to heaven in her sleep just before Christmas.

My Grandpa carefully handed me a brightly-wrapped box on Christmas morning and said, "This is her gift. Now I want you to have it."

I opened the lid slowly and tears came to my eyes as I saw a lovely string of pearls.

My Mom gently helped me fasten them around my neck. As I ran my fingers over each one, I thought of my Grandmother and all she taught me through her life...

And now these three remain: faith, hope and love. But the greatest of these is love.
1 Corinthians 13:13

FAITH

At age twenty-nine, my Grandma contracted polio and learned she would never walk again. She had a husband, two little girls, and a future suddenly very different than she imagined.


A pastor came to visit her in the hospital. He said, "Frances, this can make you bitter or better." She often told that story with a sparkle in her eyes as she said, "I chose better." I learned through her example that faith is a choice and with God we can thrive through anything.

HOPE

My grandparents took a leap of faith and started the first Christian bookstore in their city with a small kiosk in the center of a mall. Over the next few decades that little kiosk grew into a large and successful store that touched countless lives.

Many of my favorite childhood memories are of curling up in the back room with a stack of books. My Grandma taught me hope is like a small seed and, watered with prayer, it can grow into a huge blessing for many.

LOVE

For fifty-six years my grandparents shared a life together. I adore these two pictures because one is taken when they were dating and the other just a few weeks before she died. The twinkle in their eyes is still the same-and that's not easy in this world. They faced their share of challenges, like my Grandma's disability, but always got through them together.


My Nana also loved her family deeply. When I went to college, she often wrote notes to me and signed each one, SCTH (Stay Close to Him). She showed me love is a commitment that begins with Christ and then overflows to everyone else in our lives.


I still miss my Grandma Frances, especially this time of year. Sometimes I pull out her string of pearls and hold them in my hands. Then I think about how we're all creating our legacy as we live. And while the difficulties we face may seem hard to understand now, God can turn each one into beauty that blesses our family for generations.

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Holley Gerth - Cofounder of (in)courage, editorial director for DaySpring, author of Rain on Me, wife of Mark, lover of Jesus, friend to YOU.

Visit Holley at Heart to Heart with Holley or follow her on twitter as @HolleyGerth.

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12 Pearls of Christmas Series and contest sponsored by Pearl Girls®. For more information, please visit www.pearlgirls.info!

12 Pearls of Christmas: God Provides a Way

A Long Ago Christmas Memory
by Patricia Crisafulli

The old farm on a dirt road in the backwoods of northern New York State was described to me so many times, I can imagine the place, even though I never saw it: the big frame house with the wide porch, the pair of maple trees out front, and the barn in the back where my grandparents kept a cow or two, pigs and chickens, and a team of work horses.

That old house came alive for me in dozens of stories that my mother told, of how she and her sisters grew up there during the Depression. The stories had that long-ago feel not only because of the years that had passed, but also because of the era: tales of riding in a horse and buggy in the summer and a horse and sleigh in the winter. My grandfather owned an old Model A Ford, but the tires were patched beyond repair and there was no money for gasoline.

One story that has always stayed with me was of a particular Christmas in the early 1930s, a time my mother remember as the "depths of the Depression," and there was no money. In order to pay the interest on the mortgage, to keep the bank from foreclosing on the farm, my grandfather needed a relatively small sum. The amount I remember being told was $13, but for the little they had in those days it might as well have been $13,000.

Tested by trouble and sorrows, my grandparents relied on their deep and abiding faith. As Psalm 34 tells us, I sought the Lord, and he answered me, and delivered me from all my fears. The answer to their prayers was to be found right in their own backyard with gifts of the earth. My grandmother went into the woods to gather bushel baskets full of ground pine, with green sprouts like miniature boughs that spread in great patches along the earth. From willow branches she made hoops, around which she bound the ground pine to make wreathes.

She sat up all night making wreaths, enough to fill a large hamper basket, which my grandfather strapped to his back. At four in the morning, he hopped a ride on the milk train into Syracuse, where he went door-to-door selling wreathes. Night after night, my grandmother made wreaths, and day after day my grandfather sold them.

As Christmas approached, my grandmother had saved coupons that came in tins of coffee to get a Kewpie doll for her daughters. The only other things she gave them were mittens she knit herself.

Then on Christmas Eve, my grandfather came home from the last day of selling wreaths, exhausted but relieved. The farm was safe for another year. From what he had earned, he had a dime left over, which he spent on his beloved wife to buy her a powder puff. That night, my grandmother gave him her surprise: enough money from selling butter and eggs all year to buy four new tires for the Model A Ford.

Hearing this story as a child, my head was too full of the Sears & Roebuck "Wish Book" catalog to really comprehend it. As an adult, I try to fathom living with no money at all. What lingers in my heart, however, is the love of my grandparents for each other: the dashing young American soldier in World War I and the beautiful French girl he met overseas and then returned to her country to marry.

Many years, thousands of miles, and untold hardships later, that love continued. During a very dark December, they found a way together to keep the farm and the family together. And so it would always be for them.

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Patricia Crisafulli is a writer, published author, and founder of www.FaithHopeandFiction.com, a monthly e-literary magazine with stories, essays, and poetry to inspire and entertain.

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A three strand pearl necklace will be given away on New Year's Day. All you need to do to have a chance of winning is leave a comment here. Come back on New Year's Day to see if you won!

12 Pearls of Christmas Series and contest sponsored by Pearl Girls®. For more information, please visit www.pearlgirls.info

12 Pearls of Christmas: Jesus Comforts

How to Cope with Christmas
by Stacie Ruth Stoelting

Last night, I dreamed that God resurrected my beautiful adopted aunt, Mary Jo Hoffman. But morning renewed my mourning for her: Christmas trees, snow globes, and music greeted my grieving heart. Relate?

In previous years, my maternal grandpa (a.k.a. "Papa Ray") died near Thanksgiving and my adopted "Grandpa Morley" died near Christmas. Now, people cannot compare grief. But I believe we all know that the holidays challenge the grieving.

Christmas arrives like a pretty package full of grief triggers: Empty chairs, missing faces, and silent voices seem to haunt the holidays. Here are "12 Ways of Christmas" for the Grief-Stricken that have worked for me:

12 Ways of Christmas for the Grieving

1. Don't put excessive expectations on yourself. Don't expect the holidays to be the same.

2. Rest. Cut down the Christmas clutter and just get away from the typical, if possible.

3. Rearrange furniture to reduce "absence" reminders.

4. Avoid sugar highs and lows because they naturally induce emotional lows. Also steer clear of over-eating and under-sleeping. Eat well-balanced diets. Some mood enhancing natural foods include yogurt, kefir, green tea, omega-3 rich foods (i.e. salmon, cod liver oil, etc.), and lower sugar dark chocolate. One excellent resource for healthier lifestyles is First Place 4 Health, founded by the knowledgeable and kind Carole Lewis: http://www.firstplace4health.com/.

5. Admit grief. Trying to move forward while denying the reality of grief causes one to fall face forward. Does your face smile while your heart weeps? Give yourself permission to cry. Jesus wept. Weeping releases excessive tension. Address depression. Don't deny it. Pretending the nonexistence of depression only promotes its growth. (I include a list of counseling centers on my page for hurting hearts: http://prayingpals.org/linksforhurtinghearts.html.)

6. Forgive and receive forgiveness through Jesus. Release everything to the Lord -including any so-called regrets about your departed loved one. In Loved by Rebecca St. James (FaithWords, 2009), the point of God's abiding love encourages us: "He [Jesus] is ready to...stand in the gap between you and the pain, and to be your constant companion in the dark hours. He loves you."

7. Reach out to the more burdened and hang around kids this Christmas. It may not feel easy. It may even feel impossible. Ask Jesus to love thru you and get your eyes off problems and on to Him and others.

8. Understand the concept of new normalcy. The onset of new traditions and expectations may seem daunting, but God gave you your previous normal. Ask Him to give grace/hope in the face of the new normal. Let Him lead you to a place where you can relax and let Him beam His light on you.

9. Take a "hands off and hands folded" approach to the holidays. Reduce activity and increase connectivity through prayer and Christian companionship. If you're isolated, feel free to join my weekly online prayer group (www.prayingpals.org). And stay in touch with your local church.

10. Face and treat chronic health issues. If you feel sick, everything feels worse. (One excellent resource for those with chronic health conditions is Rest Ministries.)

11. Reclaim your Heavenly purpose on earth. Ask Jesus to grant supernaturally His grace, hope, love, peace, and comfort this holiday season. Then don't fight His help. Be open to His opening of doors to cope and hope this holiday season. Just receive Jesus. Ask Jesus to give you a Heavenly perspective on earth. God holds good things for you! He grants you great purpose for your life hereafter...and here, too. Embrace His grace and seek His face. He's there. I know. In the face of grief, I'm with Him right now.

12. Remember: Trials don't indicate a reduction in God's love for you. He loves you and promises to make things right in the end. Spend time focusing on His unchanging love for you. "For I am sure that neither death nor life, nor angels nor rulers, nor things present nor things to come, nor powers, nor height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God in Christ Jesus our Lord." (Romans 8:38-39, ESV)

Holidays include lots of grief for relationships/loved ones that left, forsook, or died. But let's focus on the essence of Christmas: the present of Jesus' presence in our lives! Wow, may a relationship with Jesus be our miracle and encouragement this Christmas! "Thanks be to God for his indescribable gift!" (2 Cor. 9:15)

Could you think of anything greater than receiving God for Christmas?

While my dream didn't come true today, I know it will: Mary Jo will be resurrected and we will be reunited. This year, focus on a different angle of Christmas: Let Christmas remind you of Jesus' birth to banish death.

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After Stacie Ruth met Jesus, her life blossomed with true joy and purpose! Life's blows hurt her, but Jesus heals and strengthens her. Now an author, actress, and recording artist, she laughs at the irony and praises God, who uses unlikely people...like herself. To find out more about her ministry visit www.brightlightministries.com.

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A three strand pearl necklace will be given away on New Year's Day. All you need to do to have a chance of winning is leave a comment here. Come back on New Year's Day to see if you won!

12 Pearls of Christmas Series and contest sponsored by Pearl Girls®. For more information, please visit www.pearlgirls.info

12 Pearls of Christmas: Just God

A Tangible Reminder
by Mary Byers

Last year I read Me, Myself, & Bob: A True Story About Dreams, God, and Talking Vegetables by Phil Vischer, creator of the Veggie Tales video series. I was interested because my children grew up on Veggie Tales. But I was also interested because somewhere along the way I noticed Phil Vischer was no longer with Big Idea, the company he founded. I knew there must be a story there, so I picked up the book.

Though millions of children can sing the Veggie Tales theme song, Big Idea no longer exists. After expanding too quickly, the company was forced into bankruptcy. Vischer writes about the experience in his book, which is part memoir and part business tutorial. And it's a touching example of how one man encountered grit and allowed it to be turned into grace.

At the end of the book, Vischer outlines the lessons he learned from the rise and fall of Big Idea. In part, he shares, "I was ready to be done, if that's what God wanted. To just rest in him and let everything else fall away. At long last, after a lifetime of striving, God was enough. Not God and impact or God and ministry. Just God."

His words convicted me. As an author and speaker, I realized that I'm often more focused on my deadlines or my next speaking engagement than I am on God. I have it backwards. God first, then everything else will fall into place.

It's a powerful message for us as women, too. When we focus on God first, we'll have everything we need to handle whatever is happening in our families and our lives. As Vischer reminds us, God is enough. As we approach Christmas, I'm reminded that this is the time when God shared his Son with us-a tangible reminder of his love for us. And a reminder that when we have him, we have everything we need.

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Mary Byers is the author of Making Work at Home Work: Successfully Growing a Business and a Family Under One Roof. She offers advice and encouragement for moms work from home for profit at www.makingworkathomework.com.

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A three strand pearl necklace will be given away on New Year's Day. All you need to do to have a chance of winning is leave a comment here. Come back on New Year's Day to see if you won!

12 Pearls of Christmas Series and contest sponsored by Pearl Girls®. For more information, please visit www.pearlgirls.info

12 Pearls of Christmas: Home

COMING HOME FOR CHRISTMAS
by Virelle Kidder

My mother had remarkable zeal for Christmas. Weeks in advance, she would come home from teaching school and bake late into the night. I helped clean the house and decorate the tree while my older brother Roger wired the house with Christmas lights, transforming our humble red house into a place of magical beauty. Following the church candlelight service, a crowd of happy people crunched through the snow to our house for cocoa and cookies.

We were, like many, quite alone in the years after my father left. Our Christmas open house was my mother's supreme effort to make us feel complete. It almost worked.

Despite years in church and Sunday school, God was more a distant relative I wished I knew. I grew up with a gnawing sense of incompleteness, and longed to find meaning and purpose in life. Strangely, it was shortly before Christmas years later that it found me.

My husband Steve was fully absorbed with his new job at Johns Hopkins University, and I was home with a two year old. We wanted friends, but were both hesitant when Steve's officemate his wife invited us to attend their church. We had nothing in common with "religious types," but Steve said, "Let's be nice and go just once."

Sitting in church that Sunday, my temples pounded. Hymns and Scripture verses long ago ignored called to me from my childhood. Could others tell I didn't belong here? Oddly, I felt jealous of their peace. They looked happy.

First thing Monday morning I began tearing through the unpacked boxes in our basement. At last, I found my mildewed Bible from fifth grade. I resolved to read it cover to cover. I opened to Genesis, chapter 1. Same old story; I've heard this a hundred times, and quickly slammed it shut.

No one told me God could hear my thoughts. A soft Voice whispered, Why not read as if it were true? I opened my Bible again. Suddenly I was listening to the most interesting person I had ever heard. By afternoon I was still reading in my pajamas. I couldn't stop.

I read for weeks until one day, a picture popped in my mind of a beautiful old house with wide porches, brightly lit at night. Music, laughter and lively conversation carried onto the porch where I stood in the dark, peeking in. I saw a feast and a fire on the hearth, much like the Christmas open houses from my childhood, with one important difference. There was a Father here whose face mirrored love and warmth at His children's presence. This was God's family, and I desperately wanted to be inside. But how?

A voice taunted, Why would God want you? You don't fit in this crowd! It was true. I considered giving up. Instead, I marched upstairs to our bedroom, knelt down and prayed out loud, "Lord, help me find the way! Please don't let me go!"

Verses I'd read made sense. Jesus said, "I am the Way and the Truth and the Life. No one comes to the Father except through me." (John 14:6)

Our friends explained that God already knew I was a hopeless mess and loved me anyway. Opening the door to Heaven was a gift that cost God everything. It was on the cross Jesus died to pay for my sins. He rose again to prove forever that He is the Truth. Weeping at such love, I knelt and gave Christ my life. I found that, with or without a happy family, no one is ever complete without Jesus.

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Virelle Kidder is a conference speaker and the author of six books and numerous articles whose passion is sharing the love of God with women around the world. For her latest books, please visit her at www.virellekidder.com and www.meetmeatthewell.fm

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A three strand pearl necklace will be given away on New Year's Day. All you need to do to have a chance of winning is leave a comment here. Come back on New Year's Day to see if you won!

12 Pearls of Christmas Series and contest sponsored by Pearl Girls®. For more information, please visit www.pearlgirls.info

12 Pearls of Christmas: Life Beautiful

Life Beautiful
by Margaret McSweeney


During a quiet moment after Thanksgiving, I started reading my parents' stack of love letters that I recently found in a storage box. As a Christmas gift to you, I would like to share my father's words to my mother written to her during Christmas 1949. This incredible "hug from heaven" has been a tangible affirmation that Pearl Girls has true meaning and great worth for women throughout the world. I pray that God will continue to bless this ministry and outreach. May we all realize that the grit in our lives can be transformed into grace through the love of God.

This is what I found written on a tiny folded card inscribed with "Christmas Greetings" on the front:

Christmas 1949

My Dearest Carolyn,

Truly a jewel is a thing of beauty, but a life that is lived to serve others and to glorify our Christ, such as yours, is my dearest, a far surpassing gem in radiance and beauty.

Pearls to me, symbolize this "Life Beautiful" that you have achieved, Carolyn. Each pearl is a result of a great hurt to the oyster's life. But the little mollusk builds an iridescent coat around this source of hurt, and as a result, the precious pearl comes into being. Life is like that too.

If we, like the pearl, can make of our hurts the basis of a thing of beauty, then we can bear witness to an on-looking world how Christians can overcome through Christ, blows that are seemingly insurmountable.

At this happiest season of the year, I give thanks to God for you, Carolyn - my Pearl of Great Price.

Your Claude

Isn't this an amazing Christmas Pearl? I hope this message has touched your heart, too. Another Christmas gift I would like to share with you: My father's lessons on leadership. These can be found on my guest blog post at Michael Hyatt's website.

During this holiday season, decorate your life with Christmas Pearls --- strands of God's grace-reminders that nothing can separate us from his love, not even the grittiest of circumstances.

And please celebrate the "Pearls of Great Price" in your life through Post a Pearl. It's a fun and free gift that you can share with special people who have been a blessing to you over the years.

Merry Christmas!

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Margaret McSweeney lives with her husband David and two teenage daughters in the Chicago suburbs. She's the founder of Pearl Girls and a published author. Please visit www.pearlgirls.info for more info. You can also find Margaret at her writing blog, From Finance to Fiction or on Facebook and twitter.


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A three strand pearl necklace will be given away on New Year's Day. All you need to do to have a chance of winning is leave a comment here. Come back on New Year's Day to see if you won!

12 Pearls of Christmas Series and contest sponsored by Pearl Girls®. For more information, please visit www.pearlgirls.info

Teens - don't give up on your dreams ...

you never know what God intends for you. My good friend and author, Robin Jones Gunn, (author of the several FABULOUS YA books - check them out!) recently returned from a trip to Africa. She's been longing for Africa since her college days ... read her amazing story here.

O, Africa!

You captured my heart, you beautiful land of soft skies and red earth
I waited thirty years to touch you
And now you have touched me
Forever I will carry into the quiet places of my soul
A rolling echo of your voice.
For the rest of my days
Whenever the Lord comes to me
Bringing comfort and light
I will look for the red dust on His nail-scarred feet
And I will know where He has been
~ a love note scribbled in my journal on the plane ride home from Kenya ~
November 10, 2009


I washed clothes in Nairobi!

I’m home from the LittWorld Conference that was held outside of Nairobi, Kenya. The entire trip was incredible and God felt very close! Do you remember in my October newsletter how I said I’d applied to serve in Africa when I was a college student? The position was as a “Laundry Supervisor,” but I was turned down because of my lack of qualifications. Twenty years later I met Wambura at a LittWorld Conference. She said God had sent my stories to Africa instead of sending me, and the stories had washed hearts. She also said that when I did come to her home in Kenya one day, she would help to fulfill God’s will for my life and let me wash her laundry.

Before we even reached Wambura’s apartment, we came upon a group of women washing clothes by the river. Impulsively, I asked our van driver to stop. I walked over to the women while Wambura took pictures. Introducing myself, I said, “I can’t really explain this, but it has long been in my heart to wash clothes in Africa. May I put my hands into your wash bucket?” The intrigued woman agreed, and I plunged my hands into the cold, soapy water. It was a small baptism for me, as I recommitted myself to the Lord, praying, “Cleanse my heart and my hands, Great God. Use me to serve others.” I cried and the tender woman reached for me. We hugged and smiled. Unspoken womanly heart messages passed between us. I returned to the van feeling very young and sweetly fulfilled.

Two days later we arrived at Wambura’s apartment at 11 pm. Despite the late hour, she led me to her clothes basket, and I trotted down the hall, ready to supervise her laundry. I could only pretend I was washing clothes because she was without running water due to ongoing city complications. It didn’t matter. Mission accomplished with much joy.

More more photos & a video please visit Robin's fanpage on Facebook!

Hearts

Everyone loves a good sale, Right? We'll let me tell you about a great one:

It’s a Hearts at Home
Black Friday after Black Friday Sale Dec. 7-11

Did you sleep in on Black Friday? Did you drag yourself out of bed, but still miss out on some awesome deals because you were standing in line too long at one store? Do you still have shopping to do, but dread the crowds, traffic, and cost? Let Hearts at Home help!

Their Black Friday sale has been extended to the week of December 7-11. Shop in the convenience of your own home and receive an unprecedented 25% off all of Hearts books and merchandise. They have great gifts for everyone in your family.

Find gifts for friends, teachers, bible study leaders, bus drivers, and everyone else on your list. You may even find something for yourself. This is a great time to stock up on all those Hearts at Home books you’ve been wanting to read.

Let your family know how much you would love a Hearts at Home gift certificate so you can use it for your Hearts at Home conference registration and/or Mom’s Night Out tickets.

Go to Heartshoppe.com, choose your gifts, and enter code “HEARTGIFT” upon checkout. You will receive 25% off your total purchase (before tax and shipping).

I also want to fill you in on a couple of other great opportunities!

Be sure to check out Jill Savage's blog this month (she is the founder and CEO of Hearts at Home). She is doing one giveaway A DAY through Christmas.

And, if you stop by the Hearts at Home blog December 8 - 11, you will have an opportunity to win a Heart's at Home prayer journal. The prayer journal is a brand new resource from Hearts at Home.

Merry Christmas from Hearts at Home!

Motherhood has stretched me ...

…and I’m not just talking about the marks that my polka-dot bathing suit fails to hide. (With each child’s birth my hips and thighs expanded along with my heart!) Although my physical body has changed since I’ve had children, my mental, emotional, and spiritual shape has been transformed even more.

I think like a mom, have a mom’s heart…and my ears are now tuned to K-MOM frequency. While everyone seems to have a built-in warning system (part of God’s standard package), only moms can recognize the little signal that goes off in their heads—the silent warning that tells them something’s really not right and they do need to check on the lack of noise in the other room or the thump coming down the stairs.

I’ve discovered that this God-given radar has morphed as my children have grown. I’ve learned to listen to the intricacies, tuning into the minor things that hint that something’s not exactly right, such as when I see sadness in Leslie’s expression. Or when Cory looks away a little too quickly. Or when Nathan seems fine, but that nudging inside tells me to ask…just in case. In moments like these I feel God’s Spirit telling me to stop. To turn off the computer, stop the housecleaning, or call my friend back later instead of answering the phone. Then the stop is usually followed by an urging to find a way to connect within this small window of time.

What about you? How has motherhood stretched you?

© Tricia Goyer

By Tricia Goyer, author of Blue Like Play Dough

Wanna Be Published? Feeling Discouraged?

Publishing can be so hard at times. I remember YEARS of coming "this close" to having a book published. I had projects go to committee but not get picked up. Once I had an offer for a multiple book contract ... and then the publisher changed direction and the offer was retracted a few weeks late. More than once I felt ready to give up.

Even though I'm multi-published there are always things to get discouraged about ... sales numbers that aren't what we hoped (even if they're good we can also long for more) ... rejection (I still have projects I love that haven't found a home) ... the need for more hours in the day ... and overall weariness that comes from the hard work of sitting at the desk and writing (eye strain, back aches, etc).

The thing that helped me when I was unpublished is the same thing that helps me now: relinquishment and faith in what I cannot see.

I remember after one very hard rejection on July 16, 1998 (the day before my 27th birthday!) After hearing that a project went to committee but wasn't accepted, I remember crying most of the day. And then I remember coming to the end of myself, getting on my knees at the end of my bed, and opening my hands to God asking him to take all of it. All my dreams, all my desires, all my tears, all my comparisons with others--everything.

I can't say I haven't been discouraged after that, but it helped so much to know that God was holding it all in His capable hands and he would take care of it all. I continued being diligent and doing "the one thing" He asked me to do next. And the truth is that I was surprised by what He led me to: homeschooling my kids, caring for my dying Grandfather, and launching a Crisis Pregnancy Center. He gave me small writing projects during that time, too, but my "big break" didn't come until 2001 when I got a contract for From Dust and Ashes--my first novel. After that the flood gates opened and I'm finishing my 24th book (due Monday). It is exceedingly more than I ever hoped for or imagined!

Just remember:
God placed those dreams in your heart and He has a good plan for them.

God loves you more than you can imagine.

God sees YOUR stories finished and on the shelf. He knows when that good and proper time is.

Sometimes the good work God is asking us to do isn't about writing. When I looked to see where God wanted me to join Him in my world/community I was shocked by where He led me ... but I discovered that He knew my heart and knew how I would enjoy those things, too. He knew the lives that would be reached in those places.

When I take care of God's work (the people and ministries He leads me to), He takes care of my work (the words on the page).

Finally, everything works together for good. The writing skills God gave me impacted and helped my work with crisis pregnancies, teen moms, families, etc. And the work with crisis pregnancies, teen moms, families, etc. has impacted my writing in huge ways. I'm a different person and writer because of those things.

All that to say, don't give up! His dreams are there for a purpose ... and maybe there are other, different dreams that He's eager to explore with you too. Don't be afraid of the first step ... because Jesus has all the other 999 steps taken care of for you.